something in the relationship between the painter and viewers

people think painting is a leisure

but painting is actually painstaking

it takes immense amount of spirit to put it into the work

and the methods to regain the will is no simple task either

I do know of the sensation I find when viewers can feel the effort put in the work

even the way they find discovering painter’s pain while looking at the work as a pleasant experience

it isn’t that they like to see people suffer, it’s that they have acknowledged the determination to have the work completed to be seen.

having had done the things to have this interaction happen, and when it does happen, the satisfaction that comes is off the charts.

2.2.4.4.4

when, if, and after I make.

it lets me become something else than what I was before.

I’ve been this here for a long while now, and now I want to be something more.

the entity I dreamed of being, I cannot wait anymore, so now I take courage.

I take a leap, hope that this will place me somewhere other than here, somewhere I longed-

I pray that I can stay this way, untill I get to the place I’ve longed to be, for far too long.